


Cuddles

by spoilersweetie



Category: Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-03
Updated: 2019-02-03
Packaged: 2019-10-21 21:07:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17649884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spoilersweetie/pseuds/spoilersweetie
Summary: Of course, that wasn’t to say there weren’t good things about being a woman too, and by far the Doctor’s favourite so far: cuddles. She really loved cuddles now. She wasn’t even sure if was the fact that she was a woman now, or just this particular regeneration - or just Yaz.





	Cuddles

**Author's Note:**

> This one is sickly sweet. Fluffy af. I mean it's called 'cuddles', don't even read it, I'm ashamed of myself

The fact that she was a woman instead of a man now was something the Doctor had come to fully realise much slower than it had taken her to physically regenerate into one. In the first few weeks she’d simply kept forgetting, Yaz having to grab her arm more than once and steer her into the correct restroom before she could reach the mens, and startling every time somebody referred to her as “she” or addressed her as “madam” or “mam”. Well, over two thousand years of being called “mister” or “sir” had got her rather used to being addressed as such.

Apart from the obvious physical changes, she hadn’t thought it had had much effect on who she was - no more than regenerating into a new person usually did. She was an entirely new being - the fact that she was a woman this time around wasn’t really that relevant in her mind. She started to gradually realise that her life had actually taken quite a dramatic change when she begun to notice more and more how differently she was treated now. There was the nice side of it, where men opened doors for her and offered her their coats when it was cold, but sadly more often than that was the not-nice side, where she was spoken down to and expected to do as she was told and even _catcalled_ at that one time, followed by some very lewd suggestions. From the names Yaz had called the culprits under her breath, the Doctor sadly suspected it was something that had happened to her often.

It was much more obvious the further back in time they travelled too - she even had trouble introducing herself! Apparently a woman ‘ _couldn’t possibly’_ be a doctor, and that statement was often said with a scoff that made her blood boil. The trip to Lancashire during the witch hunts was the final eye-opener when she found herself literally almost murdered because of her sex. And that was by another woman!

Of course, that wasn't to say there weren’t good things about being a woman too, and by far the Doctor’s favourite so far: cuddles. She _really_ loved cuddles now.

She wasn’t even sure if was the fact that she was a woman now, or just this particular regeneration - or just Yaz.

It had started when they’d been stranded on that planet she always forgot the name of that snowed every night of the year. Ryan had wanted to go skiing, and she’d thought somewhere with guaranteed snow was a brilliant idea - she’d maybe just forgotten a bit about the locals, which were seven foot tall with claws and an appetite for anything else that walked on two legs. They’d managed to get split up whilst being chased by a group of them on snowmobiles, Graham and Ryan sprinting in the direction of the Tardis while Yaz and the Doctor had been cut off and herded down a steep cliff that plummeted into snow covered forests. Once they’d lost their pursuers, night was drawing in, and with snow coming down heavily and temperatures promising to drop well below freezing they’d decided to shelter in the cave they’d come across for the night and head out to the Tardis tomorrow.

The Doctor had managed to get a small fire going, and was perfectly content poking at it and listening to the wind howl outside when she’d noticed Yaz, who had settled down to get some rest, shivering violently in the soft light of the flames.

“Yaz!” She’d exclaimed, alarmed. “Are you cold?”

Yaz had nodded, teeth chattering as she’d replied “f-freezing,” and the Doctor hadn’t thought twice before she’d thrown her coat off and clambered beneath it with her, wrapping herself around Yasmin’s shivering form.

“Oh my g-god, you’re s-so warm,” She’d said, and the Doctor had let her press her frozen nose into her neck, pulling her closer with a smile.

“Yep. I have a thing that means my body regulates its own temperature. Sorry - I forget humans can’t do that.”

“So you don’t feel c-cold?”

“Nope!”

It was when Yaz had finally started to drift off and the Doctor had found herself smiling at the feel of her breathing beginning to even out, that she’d realised how much she was actually enjoying being wrapped round the human woman like this. _Funny_ , she’d thought. She’d despised all forms of physical contact in her last form, and now she absolutely couldn’t comprehend why.

Cuddles were _brilliant._

Since then she’d found herself seeking them out whenever she was able, shuffling over to Yaz on the sofa when she was showing them a movie in 8D from the thirtieth century, curling into her side until she’d wrapped an arm around her and settled down with a content sigh. Or trailing after her when she’d retired to her room in that little motel they’d stayed at in America in the 1980s, delighted when Yaz let her slip into bed with her and wrap herself around her. It turned into such a habit that every other night when Yaz and the others retreated to their respective rooms aboard the Tardis for some shut-eye after another tiring adventure, after an hour or so the Doctor found herself wandering down the hallways and easing open Yasmin’s door quietly. She was never asleep - perhaps she was always waiting for her, yearning for these moments just as much as the Doctor.

She’d been tired tonight, and had told her fam that she was actually going to try and get some sleep too, something she didn’t need nearly as often as them, but when she’d retreated to her room and curled up under the covers in the dark, she’d found herself tossing and turning for hours, exhausted but awake, until finally several hours after she’d gone to bed she gave up, swinging her legs out of the bed and getting to her feet.

She pads softly down the Tardis corridors, feet taking her where she hadn’t even decided to go, until she was turning the handle on Yaz’s door and pushing it open. The room was dark and there was no movement from the bundle of covers in the middle of the bed, and she realises she probably should leave her to sleep, and starts to close the door again when she hears shuffling, and sees Yaz blinking her eyes open in the light shining in from the corridor.

“Doctor?” She mumbles sleepily, rubbing her eyes as she sits up in her bed.

“Hi Yaz,” The Doctor replies sheepishly. “Sorry, didn’t mean to wake you.”

“It’s alright,” she smiles at her. “Want a cuddle?”

She nods eagerly, face breaking into a grin when Yaz pulls back the duvet for her and she shuts the door behind her and bounds across the room to clamber into bed next to her.

“Waited for you,” Yaz mumbles, still sounding half asleep as she curls into the Doctor, resting her head on her shoulder. “But I fell asleep.”

“Sorry,” she says, wrapping her arms around her. “Didn’t know you were expecting me.”

“I’m always expecting you now. S’weird sleeping without you.”

“Oh,” she says, a little startled. She hadn’t realised how much of a habit they’d made this - enough for Yaz to think it stranger when she wasn’t there than when she was every time she went to sleep, apparently. Something nudges at the back of her mind in relation to that, but she can’t quite grasp the thought, and is distracted when she feels Yaz’s warm hand on her skin in the gap between her tshirt and pyjama bottoms. She smiles, inching herself closer as Yaz strokes the skin absently, her movements sleepy and slow.

“That’s nice,” she whispers contentedly, turning onto her side to wrap herself round Yaz fully, and Yaz’s hand slips to the bare skin of her back beneath her shirt. She starts to trace her fingertips in gentle circles on the Doctor’s skin and it feels soothing and lovely, her eyelids beginning to flutter closed in utter contentment, and then Yaz’s fingers trace down a little, stroking along the skin in the dip of her lower back and suddenly a very different feeling shoots through her and she inhales sharply, eyes snapping open again.

“Oh,” she says, realising something all of a sudden and wondering sharply how it had never occurred to her before.

“Hmm?” Yaz mumbles sleepily, still stroking that little part of her back, and the Doctor feels both heart rates increasing, and feels herself arching subconsciously into the touch.

“Ummm, nothing,” she mumbles back, hearts beating fast now and wondering with something akin to panic about how to deal with the thing she’d just realised.

Yaz sighs, pushing her face further into the Doctor’s neck and keeps stroking her fingers in that same maddening place across her back, and the Doctor bites her lip, her own fingers curling tight in Yaz’s top.

“Yaz,” she finally relents.

“Mm?”

“Can you… um, stop doing that…”

Yaz’s fingers pause, and she lifts her head from where it’s resting to look up at the Doctor. Her dark eyes are still heavy with sleep but there’s a little crinkle in the middle of her forehead that suggests puzzlement.

The Doctor wriggles a bit away from the touch on her back but all that succeeds in doing is pushing her body closer to Yasmin’s own. She swallows thickly, going still as Yaz takes the hint and removes her hand.

“What’s wrong?” She blinks at her, rubbing her hand instead over her arm. “You’ve gone all tense.”

“Sorry,” is all she can think to say, and Yaz watches her carefully.

“What is it, Doctor?” She looks painfully concerned and the Doctor feels guilty for making her worry.

“Well, umm…” She wonders how she can put this across. “You know there’s like… your friends, and then there’s like - your really good friends - like you lot, my fam, friends that you love,” she explains and Yaz’s face breaks into a bright smile.

“You love us?”

“Course I do,” she says, wondering how that wasn’t a given - there were her _fam_ , after all.

“We love you too, you know,” Yaz smiles, and she nods.

“Yes, but then there’s like… when you love someone more than a friend - well not even more but just different -” she rushes to explain, taking Yaz’s widening eyes for confusion. “Like you love them, but there’s something deeper than that too that makes you wanna be close to them all the time…”

“Doctor,” Yaz says, and the Doctor thinks she can feel that her heart rate has increased too, “Are you explaining this to me for a reason?”

“Well yeah,” she replies, thinking that was obvious, “I just realised that’s the way I feel about you.”

A very silent pause follows her words, Yaz inhales and appears to hold her breath, and when several seconds pass and she doesn’t release it, that panicky feeling begins to return.

“It doesn’t have to be important though,” the Doctor quickly amends, “not if you don’t want it to be, and it doesn’t have to mean anything needs to change between us - well except maybe that back stroking thing might have to be off limits because that’s _really_ gonna kill me if you do that again and I can’t do anything about it -”

“Doctor,” Yaz finally cuts off her ramblings, and the Doctor is relieved to note she’s breathing again, albeit quickly.

“Yes?” She breathes, hearts stuttering when she notices how Yaz is staring at her, dark eyes wide and full of wonder.

“Shut up and kiss me.”

Her face lights up, and suddenly feeling like this new little world she’d made for herself with these new wonderful people was slipping fully into place, she surges forward and presses her lips to Yaz’s.

She feel’s Yasmin’s hand against her face, cupping her cheek gently as she kisses her back and feels her press herself even closer against her, and she knows she’s grinning into the kiss but she just _loves_ when things make sense, and besides she’s pretty sure she can feel Yaz smiling too.

When they break away they are both breathless and Yaz’s smile is so bright it makes the Doctor’s ancient hearts soar.

“Does this mean you feel like that too?” She dares to ask Yaz, and she nods quickly.

“Oh my god, Doctor,” she laughs a little like she can’t believe it, “I’ve been in love with you since you fell out of the sky into that train.”

“In love?” She echoes, the words sinking into her head. Her face lights up even further. “That’s what I was trying to explain!” She realises, and Yaz laughs with delight, leaning in to kiss her again, mouth open and lips feverish against hers this time.

“I just,” Yaz pants when they part, not going far, Yaz’s breath hot on her lips as she speaks, “I never imagined you’d feel the same way, you’re… _you.”_

The Doctor shakes her head. “Me’s not so special. Just a bit slow sometimes. Thought I just liked cuddles,” she admits, and Yaz gives a breathless laugh.

She looks beautiful, eyes bright and shining in the dark and lips curled up into a smile and the Doctor can’t resist moving in to kiss her again. It’s slower this time, but deeper, Yaz’s hand winding into her hair and her tongue stroking curiously along her own.

“Yaz,” she pants against her lips.

“Mmm?” Yaz replies between kisses.

“You can put your hand back where it was before now, if you want.”

She laughs softly again, like she’s full of delight and presses herself close against the Doctor as her hand slides back beneath her top, fingers splaying over the small of the Doctor’s back and pulling her lower body tight to her own. She gasps at that, and then realises suddenly, wonderfully, there’s one aspect of being a woman she’s still yet to experience.

“Yaz,” she murmurs again.

“Yes?”

She licks her lips. “Are you still tired?”

“Strangely suddenly not so much,” she smirks and the Doctor’s face breaks into a grin and she kisses her again, rolling her underneath her.

“Good,” she smiles against her lips.


End file.
